The Past, Smoke, and a Final Wish
Immediately after entering the mansion.
I followed Gilbert down the hallway.
Ariel and Rachel had already gone up to their rooms, saying they would unpack their belongings.
They both said they would be back soon... but I couldn't avoid the awkward situation of walking alone with Gilbert.
I couldn't help but trail behind him with clumsy steps.
"......"
The atmosphere of the mansion, which I was returning to after a long time, was a little more chaotic than I remembered.
-So the Young Master has returned?
-Isn't it a bit early for vacation? He's back sooner than expected...?
-Well, his vacation was moved up due to the recent incident.
-The Head Butler went to meet him personally...
-Oh, look...! He's passing by!
Maids scurried around.
Servants were stationed sparsely in the hallways.
I frowned slightly at the murmur that faintly reached my ears.
"......The servants seem a little restless."
"Haha, well, it's not every day that the Young Master returns to the mansion after almost half a year."
Gilbert let out a weathered chuckle.
He stroked his neatly grown beard and gave a faint smile.
"They must be happy to see the Young Master."
"Haha... Your humor has improved while I was away, Head Butler."
"Does it sound like a joke?"
"It sounds like a very bad joke."
The servants, happy to see me?
That was impossible.
As I responded coldly, Gilbert's bright face hardened slightly.
He glanced at the surrounding servants.
Then, as if to make excuses for them, he opened his mouth.
"......They have been preparing to welcome the Young Master for the past three days."
"Was that the Duke's order?"
"......"
"I knew it."
So... the servants lined up at the front gate earlier, that was another one of Father's ideas.
I chewed on the light speculation.
As I was organizing the faint lingering doubts, Gilbert bowed his head with a subdued air.
"I apologize, Young Master. I shouldn't have said such a thing..."
"Don't apologize. It's not like I care."
I cut off his apology firmly.
Then, with a calm mask firmly in place, I stepped forward.
"......And, I think it's only natural."
"Pardon...?"
"There's no way anyone would welcome the madman who devoured his own mother."
"......"
Gilbert flinched at my biting words and closed his mouth.
His face was grim.
Come to think of it, Gilbert was one of the few who knew about Mother's death.
The day the tragedy occurred.
It was Gilbert who had stepped in to handle the situation in Steinar's stead, who was lost in grief.
-Young Master...?!
-Are you alright?!
I remember it vividly.
The warmth of the old man who took care of me as I stood there, dazed, in the room stained a beautiful crimson.
It didn't matter now.
Raiden had always been grateful to Gilbert.
-Thud, thud...
An uncomfortable silence flowed.
We walked down the hallway, lost in our own thoughts.
-Damn it... Here we go again.
-Quiet...! What if the Young Master hears you...!?
-Everyone be careful for a while... Unless you want to lose your head.
As I mechanically moved my weary legs.
The whispers of the servants chatting in the corner reached my ears.
A clear hostility aimed at me.
Gazes gathered and scattered repeatedly as I walked.
I twisted my lips into a bitter smile, reflecting on the negative emotions pouring out.
'This again...'
Thinking about it.
The place where Raiden caused the most trouble was this mansion.
It wasn't like I didn't expect this reaction, but it still stung when I actually faced it.
I touched my empty heart.
A fleeting emptiness turned into a bitter smile that shattered like smoke.
'This reminds me of the old days...'
The atmosphere of the mansion was filled with chilly air.
As I walked through it, I recalled memories from my previous life.
'Whenever I stepped foot in the Kendo hall... everyone used to look at me with those eyes.'
The Kendo hall.
The place where I had spent almost half of my short previous life.
Everyone there used to look at me with those eyes.
Wary, worried, afraid.
Perhaps it was because of the rumors that being involved with me would only lead to trouble.
Except for Changho hyung and Jihye noona.
Most people in the Kendo hall avoided me like I was a monster.
-Everyone be careful... Your career as an athlete is over if you get involved with him.
-Hey, Seo Changho...! I told you not to talk to him...!
-I wish that bastard would just disappear... I'm so anxious every day, it's driving me crazy...
This was a memory I hadn't revisited in a while.
I naturally accepted the auditory hallucinations that rippled through my ears.
My stomach churned.
My vision blurred, and I felt a wave of dizziness.
My legs kept trembling.
Was it because the 'Iron Will' that had been supporting me was gone?
Traumas that wouldn't have surfaced normally were now gnawing at my mind.
"Ugh..."
"Young Master? Are you alright? You've been staggering since earlier..."
"It's nothing. I'm just a little dizzy..."
"Are you feeling unwell anywhere?"
"I'm not in pain... I'm just tired."
I pushed away Gilbert's supporting hand.
It was agonizing.
I felt like my twisted expression would shatter if I let my guard down for even a moment.
"I'll go to my room first... I want to get some rest."
"But, shouldn't you go pay your respects to the Duke first since you're back...?"
"Was I ever the type to care about such things?"
You haven't forgotten that I'm the black sheep, have you?
As I gave a light laugh, Gilbert paused for a moment, then nodded.
"......Yes, I understand. Then I'll escort you to your room."
"Good idea."
Thank goodness.
If I was in my room, I wouldn't have to feel this way.
I let out a sigh of relief and walked down the hallway with unsteady steps.
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Raiden though His father giving Him a Welcome Reception by The Servants is but a complete waste of time since Raiden's aware of The Servants dislike for Him, with the exception of Head Butler Gilbert, who was One of The Few who knows what truly happen.
ReplyDeleteHe reverted back without realizing it.
ReplyDeleteThey were right, he'll hurt everyone again. But perhaps, some will bear it as they knew the reason.