***
-BAM!
Ignoring the aggressive pounding, Allen and his companions had barged into the room.
The heat from Allen’s magic washed over the once chilly room, and the light that followed illuminated the darkness that had been obscuring everything.
It revealed everything I had desperately tried to conceal.
Every trace of the life-or-death struggle I had just endured.
“…Ha.”
I, who had been lost in a daze, let out a short breath a moment later.
Perhaps it was because my throat was raw.
I tried to stifle a curse, but what came out was closer to a cough.
I pressed my hand against my throbbing forehead.
As I lifted my head, my gaze fell upon their faces, twisted in a mixture of shock and confusion.
Our protagonist, Allen.
His loyal heroines, Eivy and Clara.
…And lastly, Margaret.
“Gasp… gasp…”
I leaned back against the sofa, struggling to catch my breath.
Their uncomfortable gazes pierced me like daggers.
I clenched my jaw, feeling a wave of nausea wash over me. My lips trembled as I forced myself to speak.
“...What in the world is going on?”
My voice, weak and trembling, echoed through the room.
In response to my feeble question, Allen, who stood at the forefront of the group, mumbled in disbelief.
“What’s going on…? B-But, the letter clearly said…”
Allen’s reaction was one of utter bewilderment.
After a moment of incoherent stammering, he brought up the magic letter he had found on the floor.
“We thought the Saintess was in danger… What is the meaning of this…?”
“...”
I remained silent.
Or rather, I was at a loss for words. After a moment of struggling to form a coherent thought, I let out a hollow chuckle.
‘Is this another misunderstanding…?’
A bitter taste filled my mouth. Something hard and unyielding within me seemed to crack.
Yes, a misunderstanding.
That same, damn misunderstanding.
The absurd misunderstanding that had been haunting me relentlessly.
“...Just how many times has it been now?”
I muttered, my weary gaze fixed on the golden-haired boy.
Allen, unable to comprehend the situation, stood frozen in place.
Under normal circumstances, I might have chuckled at his naivety.
But right now, I couldn’t muster even a hint of amusement.
All I felt was a profound sense of disgust.
My hands trembled like leaves in a storm.
My breath hitched in my chest, and a heavy weight settled in my stomach.
“Just how many fucking times has it been with this goddamn misunderstanding…”
My words tumbled out, fueled by the emotions I could no longer contain.
The cramped space within me threatened to burst as my feelings surged uncontrollably.
I couldn’t bear it any longer.
It felt like every fiber of my being was being torn apart.
I pushed myself off the sofa, my legs shaky beneath me.
“Ugh…”
“M-Master Raiden! You shouldn’t be moving yet!!”
As I forced my battered body to move, Lorraine, who had been standing beside me, reached out and grabbed my sleeve.
I shrugged her off roughly.
-Thud…!!
“Ah…?!”
“Don’t… Don’t touch me…”
My voice, cold and distant, cut through the air.
It was a blade forged from resentment, honed to a razor’s edge.
“It’s disgusting… so don’t touch me…”
“But, your wounds…!!”
“Damn it, you’re no different.”
I glared at Lorraine, my eyes burning with a cold fire.
“Master Raiden…”
“You were the same… You condemned me just like they did…”
Lorraine flinched and took a step back.
Her mystical white eyes reflected her own image—an image of herself, broken and defeated.
An indescribable emotion washed over her.
I could only suppress the overwhelming exhaustion with a humorless chuckle.
“Ha… Haha…”
It was futile. And utterly powerless.
“Right… It’s always been like this…”
The scorned villain, subjected to endless misunderstandings and disgust.
That was the reality of this cursed existence.
“The banquet hall attack, the carriage station incident, even right after Master’s funeral…”
I had risked my life to save others.
I had lost a precious mentor.
I had pushed myself to the brink of death, my body a mangled mess.
I had truly given it my all.
For the sake of peace in this story, I had willingly sacrificed everything I had.
But despite all my efforts…
All I received in return was suspicion and hatred.
-P-Please…! Stop right there!
-Professor Lucas, the head professor who died in this field trip attack… Was it your doing, young master?
-I asked if you killed him.
-Young Master Lishite!! Open this door right now!!!
Fleeting images of the recent past flashed before my eyes.
Those fragmented memories transformed into sharp thorns, piercing my throat.
“No matter how hard I try… you never acknowledged me…”
Misunderstood.
Scorned.
Hated.
You had always treated me with the same disdain.
“Why…”
A bitter monologue escaped my lips, a whisper lost in the suffocating silence.
A storm of misery raged within me, its tendrils wrapping around my limbs, squeezing the air from my lungs. I couldn’t maintain my facade of indifference any longer.
“...What the hell do you want from me?”
Crack—.
The mask of apathy I had worn for so long began to crumble, revealing the raw, ugly emotions that had been festering beneath the surface.
“Answer me… Allen.”
“...”
With unsteady steps, I approached Allen, reaching out with a trembling hand to grab him by the collar.
My filthy hand, stained with blood, left a gruesome mark on his pristine white shirt.
“What… What the hell do you want from me…”
I had believed that if I tried hard enough, I could change things.
I could erase the misunderstandings, the hatred, the disgust—all of it.
I had clung to the hope that if I just gritted my teeth and endured, someday, people would see my true intentions.
That’s why I had refused to give up, clinging desperately to each passing day…
“But I’m tired now… I can’t do this anymore…”
I was exhausted.
I couldn’t keep fighting this uphill battle.
As I choked back the words I had swallowed for so long, my head hung low.
-Thud… Thud…
Hot tears streamed down my cheeks, splashing onto the floor.
The droplets spread out, painting the ground with my despair.
My throat, constricted with unshed tears, remained silent for a moment before releasing a single, broken sentence.
“Why… Why do you all hate me so much…”
My voice, fragile and cracking, betrayed the crumbling remnants of my composure.
-Ding!
[Emergency Warning Message!]
[System instability increasing due to severe mental shock!]
[Immediate rest is strongly advised!]
Cracks began to appear on the wall.
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Give our mc his peace :(
ReplyDeleteNah, it just gets more depressing from here on until end of part 1
DeleteAllen needs to get the everloving shit beaten out if him, at least once
ReplyDeleteImpatiently waiting for this
DeleteHow would you react if you found a note BLACKMAILING your friend? added to the fact that they are blackmailing her for something you did. And if that weren't enough, the person blackmailing her is someone you consider dangerous and she has a very bad reputation with women. come on man. I understand that he is the Protagonist, but take off your rose-colored glasses for a second
DeleteHO LET'S GO. ARE YOU SERIOUSLY GOING TO PLAY THE TRAGIC VICTIM IN THIS SITUATION? You could have appeared in front of everyone as a hero, cleaned up your image, etc. and what did you choose? Put on a mask and play the mysterious hero. I could have sent a letter that said. I'm going to collect the debt you owe me. I want you to heal someone. AND READY. but not. You had to be as unpleasant and easy to misunderstand as possible.
ReplyDeleteI understand that the author is trying to create a scenario where MC is the poor misunderstood victim, but this is pathetic
I agree with you! The MC could have easily dispelled the misunderstanding by telling the truth or at least some of the truth to Allen earlier rather than doing nothing for that one month time skip. The MC could literally tell Allen that he has a system like his and that is why he didn't fully tell him the details of the assassination of the princess and he can seal the deal by showing him his sword. Unless the system is preventing him from doing this, there is literally no reason that thec shouldn't be revealing this information to Allen. I can forgive not telling the truth right after he beat up Allen because he wasn't in the right state of mind. Even in this case with the letter, since he was extremely injured and not thinking fully, I can get why he didn't write a letter that couldnt be misunderstood.However, him never trying to dispell the misunderstanding after beating up Allen is on him. I don't blame Allen for his suspicion against the MC, but him accusing the MC of killing his mentor was so insanely stupid I don't blame him but I blame the author about that more. Hopefully, the MC will finally resolve this misunderstanding with Allen after this, but I can totally see the author miking this misunderstanding trope more.im just frustrated at the MC for not being smarter. Also, why is this quest to protect the school and be hidden still active after the siege is over?
DeleteTheoretically, Allen being the hero is LITERALLY the most trustworthy person in this world. so he could tell him. But if he doesn't want to tell you, there are other alternatives. Regarding your last question. Why is the motion still active? simple. for the same reason that Allen delayed him in coming to a conclusion about the murder. for the same reason that MC sent a letter of blackmail instead of one of help. for the same reason that there is a mission to go masked to fight and the reason why MC chose that option over the others when it is clear that he clearly cares what others think of him. and the reason is because the author wants to create a POOR MISUNDERSTOOD VICTIM scenario. THE LONE HERO. basically for that. The issue is that the implementation is mediocre and the logic falls apart. very bad the truth. The novel is entertaining but it is full of these errors and inconsistencies
DeleteBruh he was literally dying... do you expect him to make perfect decisions. On top of that he just lost his master. He is not going to function like a normal person fot a long time. Many people mourne for over 6 months. So i think he has plenty of thing on his mind other than correcting misconceptions that people that hate him have.
Delete